PAIN - Original Artwork

Watercolour and pen on fine art paper

Image 20 x 29 cm (8 x 11.5 inches)

Presented mounted in a black frame, overall size 30 x 38 cm (12 x 15 inches)

Ready to hang or stand

There will be NO prints of this piece, original only.

A note from the Artist about this piece:

I painted this piece at a time when drawing for hours on end and getting lost in the strokes of my pen seemed a distant memory. Time spent on my large canvases at my easel even further. Most days, even sketching and loose watercolour work had been too much.

For a while I had issues with my right hand and wrist. The pain becoming unbearable, simple tasks like using cutlery were extremely hard, let alone holding a pen. No amount of strengthening exercises helped. The muscle wastage and loss of strength was excessive.

As you can imagine, the possibility of losing the ability to do the one thing that ignites my soul was been terrifying.

And then it all got worse.

The pain spread to my shoulder. I couldn’t lift my arm.

What. The. Fuck.

My left arm was beyond tired, overcompensating for this utter annoyance. My mental health, well, let's say it was "not great", at the prospect of this, whatever the hell was happening, ruining my ability to do what I love most.

But enough was enough. I'd fought and overcome worse than this in life.

So I said NO!

I saw a private physio and was properly diagnosed. It was all coming from my neck! 2 of the 3 nerves in your neck that send signals to make your arm move weren’t working. Radial and Median. Two words I won't forget easily. I had acupuncture and physio. The pain was still there, in abundance, my hand numb, crawling with pins and needles that felt more like nails and blades.

Then, slowly but surely, I could move the lower half of my arm freely. I started sketching again, I couldn’t afford for my hands to forget what to do. Deconditioning. That's a word I would not allow to form. It just was not an option.

Then this painting happened. I couldn't bring myself to pen the title. I was too scared. Truthfully, I still am. But I need to own it to take back the power the pain has had over me.

Pain won't beat me. I refuse to let it. I refuse to let this become permanent. But it is real. And I will fight it right out the ends of my fingertips until my arm, my artist hand, is back doing what it was always meant to do.

Some days I still have the pain, but I have learned my limitations now. So I put two fingers up to them and live my life in a way that suits me.

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